“Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand” (Philippians 4:5).

The word translated “gentleness” here is the Greek epieikes. It’s a variant of eikos, the Greek word for “reasonable,” and can also be interpreted as “mildness” or “fairness.” Where it’s used as an adjective, the New King James Version consistently renders epieikes as “gentle” (1 Timothy 3:3; Titus 3:2; 1 Peter 2:18; James 3:17).

Why is gentleness or reasonableness an important quality for a Christian? And why should it be such a dominant aspect of our character that it can be recognized by everyone we encounter?

The obvious answer is that gentleness is an aspect of Christ’s nature. Jesus so describes Himself: “Take My yoke and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:29). Paul wrote to the church in Corinth “in the gentleness and meekness of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:1).

We see evidence of Jesus’ gentleness in His dealings with His disciples, with His enemies, with all those whom He encountered as He traveled. Being gentle did not mean Jesus was weak, for no one ever displayed so powerful a strength of will as He did. Nor did it mean that He never spoke critically or harshly, because He had no compunction about rebuking people forcefully when their behavior warranted it (John 2:16; Matthew 23:13-36; Luke 13:32; Matthew 16:23).

But what we see in Christ is that He was never harsh without cause. He never upbraided others to put them down or to elevate Himself above them. Even when He had reason to be angry with people, He never lost compassion for them: “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the one who kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!” (Matthew 23:37). He embodied epieikes: He was gentle, mild, reasonable and fair.

As Christ demonstrated gentleness to us, we have a responsibility in turn to be an example to others, to “let our gentleness be known to all men.” If we conduct ourselves honorably in the sight of the world, “when they speak against you as evildoers, they may, by your good works which they observe, glorify God in the day of visitation” (1 Peter 2:12). Our meekness will cause those who revile our good conduct to be ashamed (1 Peter 3:15-16).

After all, what character does it require to be mean and cruel? None at all, of course; anyone can do it. But to be gentle in the face of persecution, mild amid adversity, reasonable when others are unreasonable? That’s a test of genuine strength. Remember Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem: “If you can keep your head when all about you others are losing theirs and blaming it on you…you’ll be a man, my son!”

Gentleness shows confidence in God rather than oneself. That’s why Paul follows his admonition to gentleness with “The Lord is at hand.” We find it necessary to respond in like manner to the unkindness of others only when we don’t trust God to be God. “Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:19). When I keep that statement in mind, I don’t need to punish people for their slights against me. If they merit punishment, God will deal with that. I therefore am free to remain gentle and reasonable. If there’s cause for wrath, let it be the wrath of a righteous God and not my fallible judgment.

“If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12:18). More often than not, how I live with others does, in fact, depend on me. I can’t control the actions of those around me, but I can certainly marshal my reactions to them. In so doing, I open doors of opportunity that I would slam closed with bitterness or hostility. When the servant of the Lord is “gentle to all,” they may “come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil” (2 Timothy 2:24-26).

Having a gentle, quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4) is not always easy. Sometimes we let our emotions get the better of us, and we do and say things to people that we later regret. We need to remember the example of the One who was and is “gentle and lowly in heart” and follow in His ways. “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:21).