On Wednesday of this week [January 19, 2005], the Lord willing, Karla and I will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. If all goes according to plan (and you remember what Robert Burns said...), we will share dinner that evening on the uppermost floor of the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas, looking out at the glittering lights and neon of the great desert oasis.

After two decades of living with me, I figure the woman deserves some reward (smile!).

Not long ago, I saw where a man who lost his spouse to cancer had written, “Everything I ever needed to know, my wife was trying to tell me.” Knowing my wife, she would refuse to claim that kind of credit. But the fact of the matter is, I have learned much from Karla over these twenty years. Indeed, our marital experience has shed light on many passages of Scripture that I would likely never have understood with quite the same clarity otherwise.

A few examples of things my wife has taught me:

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). I am by nature an insular person. I keep my feelings and thoughts to myself much of the time, and I don’t require much attention or company. I have learned, however, the necessity of openly sharing life with another person, in a unique way that cannot exist outside this special relationship the Creator of all, in His wisdom, devised.

“For wherever you go, I will go; and wherever you lodge, I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God, my God” (Ruth 1:16). From the second day of our marriage, when we traveled to our new home near Modesto, Karla has gone with me wherever circumstance has dictated. I have no doubt that she would follow me faithfully to the ends of the earth, so long as there was a place to plug in the vacuum cleaner.

“Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30). When I chose a wife, it was important to me to find someone who would be willing and able to accept the unparalleled challenge of being the wife of a gospel preacher. Karla was willing, and has proven herself more than able. Her strength is often the line of demarcation between my perseverance and my surrender.

“Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun, all your days of vanity; for that is your portion in life” (Ecclesiastes 9:9). Many men say, “I married my best friend,” so I won’t be the first. I will, however, be one of those who truly means what he says. There is no one on earth I more enjoy spending time with than my wife. We have always, even in dark hours, found ways to share joy and laughter together.

“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear” (1 Peter 3:1-2). My wife did not win me to Christ, but she has more than once, by her example, won me away from the thoughts and deeds of Satan. Quite often, she steers me back onto the right path through her silent and humble obedience.